Project Kitty Manipulation
I rent out my condo to this analyst guy. He’s been in there for a while now. Since September I think. Part of the rental agreement was that he’d get a $50.00 per month rent break if he took care of my cat for me while living in the condo. I’d, of course, provide for the kitty’s food and litter. Now, some might think this is an insensitive plan. That’s ok. I admit it’s not a conventional commitment between my cat and I. Unfortunately though, Eric, Lady, Dinah and I could not all live in Eric’s condo together. I had to choose between Eric, the man I want to have children with, and Dinah. Dinah - the loving pet that pukes all over my belongings, expresses her anger in cat piss, and likes to eat precious photos, birth certificates, and year books – just for fun. I chose Eric. Fuck you very much.Initially, I was afraid of letting my cat live with someone else. I was afraid both for the someone else and for the cat. On one hand, Dinah can be a hand full, but on the other hand I knew I wasn’t going to have a personal relationship with the renter, and therefore I was risking my cat’s life. Animal dorks you can chill out now because it turns out that it was a match made in heaven. After 8 months of rental bliss the two have gotten along fabulously. The Renter e-mailed to tell me today that he just got a new cell phone and Dinah, my cat, is the background picture of his new cell phone display. Here are his exact words, "I got a new cell phone and Dinah is the wallpaper. I will give her extra snacks as a commission for using her likeness. :) The Renter"
Project Kitty Manipulation is a go. He has officially given his heart, and his cell phone display space, to my cat. Therefore, I imagine it highly possible that when I’m ready to sell my condo, or The Renter is ready to move out, Dinah will be all his! And happily so. Yessss! That, my friend, is a guilt free way to give your pet away.
posted by Jessiedc28 @ 1:50 PM
11 Comments:
Congrats! The force is strong in you, grasshopper!
Give your kitty away? AW!!!! I wouldn't be with a guy who didn't like cats (or animals in general, for that matter.)
It's a good thing Chuck is a cat lover. He has a dog and a cat at his house. I have two cats. But his animals were dumped onto him by his ex wife. He doesn't have the heart to give them away. Now that's a keeper!!! ;P
Jaq, I love you. I really do!!! but that is why you apply to the "fuck you very much" catagory!!! I too love animals -- but we live in an 800 sq. ft. condo and dinah tends to pee when emotional. Not to mention she scares the shit out of our dog. And Eric wouldn't have me if I brought a cat over that peed all over his shit, gave his dog a heart attack, and to top it off -- left him in an allergic fit. Love can only go so far.
Not to mention, I can't make love to my cat, have her babies, nor will she buy me a diamond. Quite frankly she sucks in bed. She licks my forhead all night long. Eric, on the other hand, knows what to do with his tongue in bed, and when . Case settled!
Did you say your Chuck wanted my cat? SOLD! FOR FREE!!!
Get her baby!
E
Aw, I hate those nervous animals!! And the ones that shed like crazy! (And Chuck is a hunter, too. Not too keen on that. I guess I can make an exception!)
I've been married before, so I guess I feel differently about the whole thing! No offense, dearie!
So okay, you've made all these sacrifices. SO WHERE'S THE FUCKING DIAMOND ALREADY?????
;P
I wuv you too!!!
And sorry, Chuck won't accept anymore animals. He's had enough dumped on him recently! (Of course I'd take her if I had the room. Dang it!)
Jacq,
Well see it 's nice to know you feel my pain. "No room"!
Jessie
Gosh, from all the pictures you've posted of your place, it seemed so much bigger.
The allergy thing is the worst. I'm surprised I continue to keep animals.
You know what, I am so sorry for phrasing my response the way I did. I didn't read your post all the way through and I should have. I didn't realize you guys were having those issues with Dinah. I would never intentionally say something to offend you!
(But I still want to see that dang ring! heh)
You didn't offend me. It's fine. WE just have a small place with NO storage. It would be one of those situations where her litter box would have to be in bathroom, or in the kitchen. Ick! Besides...this guy LOVES her and TRUST ME she's feeling the love and not the resentment -- which is better.
OMG, that reminds me of the last place I had!!! You wanna talk NO SPACE! Dang! No storage, no CLOSETS!!! It was the tiniest apartment I had ever seen. It shouldn't have even had walls. And I can't believe I managed to live there for 2 1/2 years. I moved just a few blocks from my office in 2004. Perfect location. It's a college town, so everything is pretty much in one place. A lot of beautiful old houses. Kind of reminds me of Old Town Alexandria. Only way smaller!
Aw, and it's really good that she has a new home with someone who loves her, too. That's the best of all.
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