Huh.....

22 Days to go

22 days to go!

Last night I saw some stupid car commercial that was advertising it's safety based on side impact air bags. At first you have no idea what the commercial is about. There is a nice looking couple in a car, driving down the road, discussing the movie they just saw. Then BAM! out of the middle of no where they get smacked in to by a car driving really fast.

My heart stopped.

I quickly sent a text message to Eric telling him how much I love him, and to drive carefully on his way home from band practice, in small abbreviated words.

It's odd how the closer we get to the wedding the more precious his life is to me. I've known that I love Eric for a long time but for the first time it's sinking in that this is the person you've chosen to spend THE REST OF YOUR LIFE with and if that person was to die -- it'd FUCK YOU UP. Bad.

It's my worst nightmare -- losing Eric.

On Monday I got an e-mail from a woman who works in our company explaining that her assistant, someone I didn't know personally but I've worked with over the phone for the last six years, will not be in the office for some time because her husband was killed suddenly at work last Friday. Her husband worked at home but went in on Friday to lend an extra hand. I believe he worked for the fire department. Anyway - he was electrocuted at work -- and suddenly on a Friday afternoon he's dead.

After I heard that I picked up the phone and called Eric and said "I love you I love you I love you" to which he replied "I know..." proudly. HOW SCARY to think that I could lose him like that?

I do try not to think about those types of things because I realize it's dumb to worry about something that hasn't happened much less something that might never happen. But I really hope we die of old age together..... at the same moment...and in our sleep.....and holding hands. Is that too much to ask for?

posted by Jessiedc28 @ 6:50 AM